Two Weeks Post Op

I must confess that I felt a little deflated this week. After a 6 kg loss last week I was hoping for something similar this week.  Stupidly I weighed myself on Monday and I had gained a kilo.  SERIOUSLY!  How does one gain a kilo when one is only on fluids!  It was beyond me.  I was beginning to feel it was a big waste of money and that nothing was going to work.

By Thursday I had lost the kilo again but I was just getting more depressed.  If I could have I probably would have ordered a pizza to drown my sorrows.

Friday morning I refused to weigh myself.  I had a Dr's appointment (something entirely different).  My GP asked me how I was going and I told him that it seems I am struggling to lose yet again.  He then asked me how active I had been which really is very little thanks to the pain I have had which occurred more intense when I moved.  He made me realise that that was the most likely reason.  I have always said I need to exercise to lose weight so just because I am on fluids doesn't mean I can stop moving.

The rest of the day was spent shopping with mum and we were out for a few hours.  Basically this has helped prove my Dr's point because I finally lost another kg today.  I now weigh less than I have for over 3 years and I am 1 tenth of the way to my goal weight.

On another note, I graduated from fluids to mash today as well.  Doesn't this 1/4 cup of potatoe/avocado mash just look divine.  Trust me, it tasted divine.

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Its Finally HIt Me

I was so pleased that I did not get the pain in my shoulder from the anaesthetic nor did I get the pinching feeling under my diaphragm.  Unfortunately whatever they injected to prevent this, wore off Sunday night.  Now I know why they sent me home with pain killers. 

These drugs certainly knock you out that is for sure.  You would think I would be getting a decent sleep but I haven't.  Due to the burning sensation in my lower abdomen I can't get out of bed easily so I have been sleeping in the recliner chair.  Not the best bed and my back and shoulders are complaining to me about it.  Thankfully the burning sensation is dissipating so I hope to sleep in my own bed tonight.

I said I would go back to work tomorrow but I don't think I will be.   I am so tired and the pain doesn't help much either.

A friend came to visit me the other day with her baby boy.  He (the baby) bought me a gift: his favourite pureed dessert.  That will be on the menu on Saturday.  LOL

One week on

This time last week I was in surgery.  Thank God that is over.  I weighed myself this morning and have lost 4kgs so far. 

Food wise I am still on half a cup of fluids per meal.  This is anything from broth to watered down custard and yoghurt.  I am also having the Optifast soups and shakes.  

At the moment I still have the burning pain if I move around too much.  To pass the time I have been catching up on some shows I have missed.  I think the TV has it in for me.  On one show they are eating cream pastries, another, it is a beautiful roast.  The adds come on next and my favourite Chicken Fast food outlet has just released chicken, chips and gravy.  At the same time my mother has cooked lamb shanks (my all time favourite that I rarely get to eat) so that I can have the broth.  Here I am sipping away at half a cup of yummy lamb broth (yes it was yummy) and my mother sitting next to me chowing down into a scrumptious, juicy lamb shank.  

In a weeks time I can graduate to pureed food.  I think I am on that for about 3 to 4 weeks.  I never thought I would ever say, "I can't wait to eat baby food."

Post Opp

It has now been 5 days since my operation. I must admit I was rather surprised that I did not feel worse.  I didn't feel nausea's at all and I was up and walking around that evening (albeit slowly).  It felt more like I had coughed constantly for 48 hours.  

The thing I dreaded the most was the shoulder pain that you can get from the anaesthetic.  I have had it before and it can last for days.  I mentioned it this time and I think they injected something to help ease it.  It did better than that as I didn't get it all.

On Sunday I had visits from friends and my mother.  This is the day my surgeon told me to tell people not to come because I would feel rotten.  He got the surprise of his life when he walked in and saw us all laughing.  He asked me how I was doing and I said I felt fine but I'm still fat.  That was when one of my friends said that a little nip and tuck would have helped me on my way. This was in the evening and I was still only on water and considering I was feeling so well he went out and brought me back a Frosty Fruit (icy pole).  It was the best gift I have ever had.

Of course my friends know me well.  I got some lovely flowers and a couple of minions to keep me company.

On Monday I started to get a small burning pain in my lower abdomen but all else was fine.  I went for my CT scan and was given the all clear to have clear fluids.  My first meal was dinner and it was a beef stock that tasted like watered down soy sauce.  Thankfully I had jelly as well. I had about half of each over an hour or so.  It wasn't long after this was delivered that the evacuation alarm went off.  It was a false alarm.  Apparently a fault in the PA system.  My nurse told me that it took a while to get the all clear because everyone was phoning in asking her if they needed to evacuate and the all clear phone call couldn't get through.  Little bit of excitement to add to an otherwise dull day.  

It was nice to go home on Tuesday.  I am now off clear fluids and onto anything I can easily suck up through a straw.  The small burning pain has increased to a band that goes to my side but I can keep it mostly at bay with pain killers.  The worst time for it is first thing in the morning when trying to get out of bed.

The hardest thing right now is trying to keep my fluid intake up.  My stomach has gone from 2L to 300 ml so I get full almost in one mouthful at the moment.  It is also hard to tell when to have something more nourishing because the area of my stomach that made me hungry has been cut out. I am sticking to the traditional meal times for now.

Tis The Night Before

Tomorrow morning it is. Bright and early, 6am admission, first in theatre for the day.  I am not nervous though I have given instructions to friends that if I die they are to turn up at my funeral dressed as the Grim Reaper or Ghosts.  It was suggested that only one person come as the Grim Reaper and stand there pointing at other people but I want everyone to get in the spirit.  My funeral will be a fancy dress event. 

Anyway this is not about death and funerals because I don't intend to die, suffer for a couple of days definitely, maybe wish I was dead for the first day but definitely have faith in my surgeon and anesthetist.  Both were there when I had the stomach band put in and again when it was removed.  If I knew then what I know now, I definitely would have had the stomach sleeve straight away.

Considering I will be staying in hospital for a couple of days (3 at most) I am taking a book to read.  I also seem to always end up on the children's ward, so I am taking colouring pencils and an colouring book.  Don't freak, it is an adult colouring book.  My mother thinks I am nuts for packing these items but I figure if I don't take them then I will want them.  Murphy's Law at its best.

Time to sign off.  I won't be taking my phone or laptop with me so I will be missing from social media for a few days.  Don't forget me.  :)

Drastic Measures

Those of you who know me, know how much I struggle with my weight.  I've tried programs and doing it on my own.  I only get so far and then the weight loss stops.  After a while you just give up and think what the heck!

I have been successful this year in losing close to 10kg with the help of a program that gets you moving again.  The class was once a week but I made sure I was doing lots of walking.  All was going well until things unraveled.  Slim people call them excuses, but I would like to see them carry on in such pain.

First to go was my shoulder.  I have always had issues with my left shoulder from as long as I can remember.  Apparently I have a bursa and it is bad enough to be operated on but for some reason I still have full motion, as long as I am not exercising.

Second to go was my right knee.  Again an old ongoing issue that only comes up when I am exercising.

Third to go were my orthotics.  This is no surprise considering I have had them for 10 years.  For two weeks I was unable to walk long distances until the new ones came in.  This was enough to set me back almost to where I was at the beginning of the year prior to my classes.  The new orthotics then caused blisters under my feet and so on and so forth.  It took a good 2 months to get them sorted.

Final thing to go ... even with the orthotic issue I forced myself to walk even though it was painful.  With all this walking going on my muscles were getting tighter and tighter to the point where my muscles around my hips are so tight I have to go to physio and specialised pilates classes to help me relax them.  Despite my weight I am quite flexible and find it very difficult to stretch my muscles.  These muscles now cause a lot of back, hip and leg ache.  I was told not to walk up hill or up stairs (unavoidable unfortunately).

The weight loss struggle has come full circle again.  I have to exercise to lose weight.  There is no other way around it.  I already don't each much (and no I am not in denial on that).  Therefore with all of the above and a nagging mother (who I love very much but can only handle so much nagging from), I have decided to get a stomach sleeve done.  Do I think I am insane?  Yes.  This is my last change though.  If this doesn't work I will probably say stuff the lot and eat what I want.  At least I will die young and enjoying myself.

My operation is in a weeks time.  I am currently on the pre op diet.  Thankfully it is what I was doing while I was exercising, which is the Optifast Diet (the first one).  Optifast comes in bars, soups, shakes, and desserts.  I get one product for breakfast, one for lunch, one for dinner with some vegetables.  When I did this before I didn't feel so hungry but I do now.  I think it is because I know that it may be a couple of months after the op that I can enjoy solid food again.

This is day 3. Tomorrow the weekend starts so I have two days where I could give in and have a nice cheese toastie, though I probably won't.  We were shouted pizza at lunch by our manager today and despite everyone deciding my desk was the one to sit around, chat and eat pizza, I maintained my willpower and had chicken soup.

Photos are one thing I hate the most about myself but I figured I needed a before shot.  Here is my mug shot.  Please do not copy it and use it in vain.